EVEN MARY POPPINS GETS THE BLUES

EVEN MARY POPPINS GETS THE BLUES

Coffee With Jesus

January 29, 2024 

Good morning, Lord I love You.  I thank You for being our Ishmael, The God Who Hears. I came to You with my heart so full of tangled emotions, mostly negative. They sat like an uncomfortable, heavy stone of misery in my chest. I knew that was not a good way to begin my day and I really didn’t want those negative emotions spilling over on the person for whom I provide care, or any others who might cross my path. It’s so hard to untangle the snarls of all those dark ugly emotions that seem to overpower the sunshine in our day. I came to You hoping for you to calm the tempest in my soul.

You listened as I poured out my heart. I told you that I was weary of trying to manage it all. I’m failing, floundering, drowning, weighed down by weariness, resentment, anger, hurt, fear and loneliness.  I love my husband but living with Alzheimer's is sometimes really hard to do. I’m tired of shouldering all the responsibility for our household: paying bills, working part time outside of our home, keeping up with housekeeping as best as I can. I try to get my husband to engage in as many activities as possible as possible but unless I attend with him he will not go. I’m so irritated all the time, annoyed by the smallest things.

Lord, I’m lonely.  I miss the partner who helped me shoulder the hard times. I really miss the conversation and the companionship that came so easily with my husband before Alzheimer's barged into our lives demanding so much attention, effort and extra everything! I know that You are always with me, faithful, compassionate, unconditionally loving to me, this sinful, selfish human that I am. I am reminded that You are a God who keeps their Promises. You promise to answer when I cry out to you. You tell me that there is nothing too terrible for me to tell you. And you do listen and answer. 

Today as I poured out my troubled heart to you, you whispered to me, “Remember, even Mary Poppins gets the blues.” I smiled at the memory you brought forth, that of a young teen client in one of the families I counseled in my pre-retirement career declaring that I was “like our family’s own Mary Poppins, always bringing help, happiness and laughter when you come for family sessions.”  I reminded that young man, that life isn’t always like the movies, that “Sometimes even Mary Poppins gets the blues.”.  I laughed with You about that memory.  But then I got the points you wanted me to see. You reminded me that the expectations I put upon myself are much heavier than what you expect of me in my care for my husband, that yes, there will be hard times, sad times, but you will share the load. You will lift me up. I do not have to carry my burdens alone. You will help me find agencies or ask others to assist when I am unable to meet the needs of the person I care for while taking care of myself so that I can have enough personal reserve to care for another.

PRAYER: Lord, we thank you that through Your holy word You tell us that even You, in earthly human form, had to go away for rest, prayer time and respite from the needs and demands of others. You know the biological need for rest for our holistic health of body, mind and soul. You Lord are always there when we’re failing, floundering, drowning to lift us up and set our feet on firm ground. You are the sovereign God who hears, it’s up to us to open our spiritual ears to listen, to hear You speak through your word. Your word never returns empty. Thank you for being our hope and strength when we are feeling empty. You are there to fill our emptiness and we are grateful. Jesus, it is in your holy name I pray.

Psalm 40:2

Mark 6:31-32

Isaiah 40:29

Jeremiah 29:12